Change

Is it normal to want to constantly change oneself? To always want to improve transform and just be a completely different version of yourself? Sometimes I feel trapped in my ways and although I get so much praise from people around me I am.not happy with who and what I am I feel like I know I could do better I know my potential I see how far off my potential I am yet I feel chained to the things jeeping me from.reaching that potential... It feels like I am always underperforming as soon as the score is not 100 out of 100 and the closer to 100.I would get the more.frustrated I would be to know how close I was and I will keep juggling how I knew I should have gone left or right and didnt and thats what knocked me down. I am an all.or nothing.perfectionist if its not perfect my engagement completely dissolves and the task gets fully neglected. It is frustrating.. I am not.miserable because I have a lot.of.gratitude which counteracts a lot.of negative thoughts and I am happy for achievements and rewards through gratitude I also lean on hope an emotion that allows me go still.work.towards one day being at a perfect state whether perfect or not just perfect to me. Can anyone relate? I feel like I need to reinvent myself but I never do.. my downfalls are inconsistency doing too much jack.of all trades master of none and laziness and indifference. I am preparing for a new year and need to clear out all the cobweb and writing is mt remedy my only therapy and guess what I am writing with spelling mistakes to avoid removing everything because its not just right. But its alright 😘😘😘

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